| If he had not been such a bad father, J. D. probably would not have been in this predicament. In a court battle for custody of his young son, he wanted to do the right thing now. Yet, he had several strikes against him from his past. |
Unworthy But Not Worthless
by Dr. Phil Cox
If he had not been such a bad father, J. D. probably would not have been in this predicament. In a court battle for custody of his young son, he wanted to do the right thing now. Yet, he had several strikes against him from his past.
It was true, he had been unworthy to be responsible for raising a little boy. He had been drunk for three years. He barely remembered those years, except that He worked, drank, and argued with his wife. J.D. had every reason to believe he was just no good. He could disagree with people, but he could not argue with his own history.
Yet, he knew somehow he was not worthless as a person. This was the key in J. D.’s recovery and current effort be a good dad. Though his deeds had clouded his worthiness, they had not taken way his worth. Do you see the difference?
The fact that he had a son made him worth something. The fact that he now sought ways to be a new man made him worth something. The ultimate fact that Christ died for him gave him value beyond legal language. Since he had been "bought with a price," he would never be worthless. Neither are you.
Unworthiness is common to us all in terms of deserving salvation. God’s grace finds no friendly company with our misdirected efforts, self-centered thinking, and pure weakness. So, we must give up worthiness. It never existed for us in the first place.
Worthlessness, however, describes no one. In some marital power struggles, one spouse will attempt to put all the blame on the other, and will attempt to attach labels that demean and degrade. Do not take on the role of being worthless. There are too many things that make you worth something. Family provides you worth. Employment provides you worth. Talent and creativity provide you worth. One person to love you provides you worth. Above all, "... God so loved [your name] that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life." You cannot buy, marry, or lose worth of that kind. It was done long ago, with you in mind. Your failures, sins, and struggles were all there for God to see when He put together this remedy, long before you ever sinned in the first place.
J.D. lost a lot of time on his binges. He decided it was time use what time he still had. I don’t know the outcome of the custody battle. I don’t know if he is still working steadily. I don’t know what kind of father he is right now. But I know he can still have it all with Christ. So can you.
Phil Cox lives in Lindale, Texas with his wife and two children. They serve a loving congregation of people at the North Lindale Church. Phil
has a Ph.D. in Clinical Christian Counseling and serves as preaching
minister and pastoral counselor. He can be contacted by email at:
pcox@lakecountry.net or by phone at (903) 882-1680. If contacted by email, mention "counseling" in the subject line to be sure we see it.